A Life's Great Work

Yesterday I got the Nolo book, How to Do Your Own Divorce in California. An excellent resource to whether do your own work, or at least know better how it all works. The books is very complete and matter of fact. Yes, in California, all you need to do is pay $320, file the papers, and about 6 months later it's official. True, I had better know what's going on, and be informed on some decisions. I read much of it this morning in bed, and cried.

Today after church I attended a small group that meets for lunch and Bible study at a local restaurant. All the people there have known Mrs. Ray since high school, and me for the several years we have lived in town. They knew some of what was going on, and I announced Mrs. Ray was moving to her own place next weekend. In prayer (along with other prayer things), there was no dry eye. They are all stunned, and sorry for the situation. Mrs. Ray told me that I'd "be the one they all feel sorry for". That's not the case. They feel sorry for both of us, as the breakup is a tragedy.

Since this morning (in prayer) I came to see a mission of sorts: our marriage will be my Life's Great Work. Mrs. Ray, as I write this, is set on a course to walk out of this marriage. She has her reasons, which she feels are valid, though Pastor Jim (after talking with her) feels the biggest problem is "Annoyance".

Many people are praying for our relationship. I am doing my absolute level best to follow God's leading in all I do and say around Mrs. Ray. This is a long, L-O-N-G row to hoe. Frankly, I don't see a good end. But todays sermon was on HOPE. Coincidence??????

As we interact, Mrs. Ray now seems to distance herself whenever it is possible. I have offered to help her move Friday and Saturday. That's OK, but when her daughter comes over Saturday afternoon, I should try to make myself scarce. I offered to look at her daughters brakes, and even do the brake job, but that's too presumptuous of me. I am sooo helpful when I can use my skills for the benefit of others. It pains me when I am turned down for things like this.

• My prayer now is to keep on keeping on.
• What I want for Christmas? My wife.
• Will my Life's Great Work be successful? If I knew, I wouldn't be writing this blog.
• Do I have faith that God can work this out? My faith is weak right now, it goes up and down.
• Do I have Hope? That is all I have, and it wavers, also.